Updates from Cancerland

I haven’t posted in quite awhile. I’ve thought about it. Had several ideas, but frankly, summer was tough. I lost another good friend to this dreaded disease on July 6th. My friend S., whom you can read about in the post entitled “Friends in Low Places” (August 2014) passed away. She fought cancer for what seemed like a lifetime. This past round they gave her 6 months, and true to form, she lived two years. She was the embodiment of life and living. She was an amazing woman, who everyone wanted to be around. Losing her stung and will for years to come. Losing my cousin in January and S in July……… there are just no words.

Anyway, I wanted to update my health situation on my blog. It’s all good news. In July, my scan showed the active cancer areas had either resolved or become less active. It looks as if the new medications are working. I am truly grateful and happy, but there is also that sense of guilt. Watching others struggle, slowly fade away, and eventually die, while I seem to be given second, third, fourth chances…….It’s called survivor’s guilt. I’m sure most are familiar with the term. I know I shouldn’t feel guilty, but I do anyway. I don’t think it’s something that can be avoided.

My oncologist is on maternity leave until November. I will see a physician’s assistant on Monday, receive my shots, and hopefully another cycle of Ibrance. Blood counts are the deciding factor and for the last few cycles, while my counts definitely go down, they do not drop low enough to justify stopping the medication. Especially if it is working. Other than the blood counts, side effects are minimal to none. I think I actually feel better on this medication than I did on my last one. I seem to have more energy and my joints do not hurt nearly as much. I’m exercising more and even walked a 5K in August with my friends. My new routine has me walking one 5K per week and hopefully building up to a 10K walk in October. I will let you know how it goes. I continue to work full time as well.

Sorry for the solemn post. My creativity just isn’t flowing as usual. Too much loss in too short a period of time. I’m hoping to emerge from my emotional slump soon.

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